Top Ten Tips for Ensuring a Happy Christian Marriage

Ensuring a Happy Christian Marriage

Today, many people mistakenly believe that a Christian marriage can survive and thrive simply because both people share a similar faith in the salvation of Jesus. While this is an important element of the union, other aspects of marriage cannot be ignored. In fact, if you do not look at each aspect of marriage within a Christian context, you may actually find that having a satisfying marriage that will last a lifetime is even harder.

Compatibility in Faith - and the importance of faith dating

As you may be aware, there are many different denominations of Christianity. If you and your significant other are from different churches, it may not be easy to reconcile places where your beliefs do not match. For example, if you are Catholic and believe firmly in the rite of confession, trying to marry someone that rejects confession may create an enormous conflict. Unfortunately, the early stages of love can lead you to believe this and other issues can be overcome. When those feelings wear off and nothing changes, you are both bound to feel hurt and dismayed.

Political Outlook and Christian dating

There is no question that talk show hosts and other pundits are continually trying to force the idea that a good Christian is a conservative Christian. Sadly, this goes against many of the deeper instincts that come of a life lived in accordance with the scripture. Aside from creating a flock of closet liberals, you are bound to find that living this kind of internal life will cause problems in your marriage. Rather than let this ruin your future, it is very important to recognize the true political outlooks of your partner, as well as how they will evolve. This will be discovered more by watching actions and expressions, as opposed to having rhetoric filled conversations. Future Goals It is fair to say that marriage is about two people creating a shared path through life. During that time, each person will have individual goals to achieve as well as ones related to the marriage. Both partners should have a clear understanding of how they will pursue these goals as well as the impact on the other person. If you cannot reconcile future goals in terms of travel, educational needs, or time spent in goal pursuit, then you will have serious problems in the marriage. Unfortunately, if you try to gloss over that by saying “faith will fix it”, you are bound to be in for an even bigger disaster. Money No matter whether you are rich or poor, it is always best to be with someone that shares your ideals about budgeting and financial priorities. Sadly, far too many people will agree with you, and then turn around and do just the opposite once the marriage papers are signed. You should never simply hope that things will work out because of faith. In fact, if there is ever a time when you need to pray for guidance, it will be before you get trapped in this kind of marriage. Family Ideals In a sense, it can be said that family ideals tend to be slightly easier to sort out in a Christian marriage. If you both have the same faith based views on birth control, abortion, and care of elderly family members, then you can use that faith to deal with any trials that may come along. That said, you should still both think carefully about how family values will impact other aspects of the relationship. This includes finances and goal acquisition. Even though faith may get you through family issues, you may not always be happy with the wounds that are left behind. Kindness and Compassion Even though your partner may seem like the most incredible person in the world right now, stress, mental weakness, and emotional instability can do horrible things to people. This includes leading to violence and abuse at every level of being. No matter whether your partner becomes the type that kicks the dog or belittles you nonstop, the marriage will be a disaster. You should be very aware of the fact that being stuck in this type of marriage for life can easily make you want to die. Rather than get stuck, you can, and should take all the time you need, and test as well as you can the full range of emotions that your partner is apt to display in the relationship. Sadly, no amount of faith can fix these problems, especially if your partner is not willing to change or feels entitled to be abusive. Lifestyle Choices A number of people that watch right wing talk show hosts have been led to believe that a good conservative Christians must eat meat, remain obese, and look up exercise as akin to taking up with demons. Needless to say, modern Christians are in different stages of acceptance or rejection of these and other lifestyle choices. It is very important to realize that both you and your partner may reach points in your relationship where you are no longer compatible in these areas. Food Choices Even though you may both say your relationship can survive when one partner eats meat and the other doesn't, you may just be in for a very rude awakening. When it comes right down to it, there are few things worse than being vegan and having to put up with what becomes a very noxious smell of meat cooking in the home. On the other side of the coin, your partner is bound be driven insane watching you turn your nose up at what is perceived as food needed for life and good health. Magic Bullet Thinking As a general rule of thumb, there is no such thing as a faith or spiritual belief that can overcome the inner nature of two people. In fact, if you understand the concept of free will, and the non-interfering nature of the true Christ, then you can readily see why Christians must build happy marriages using the same blueprints used by others. Failure to recognize these facts can and will lead to marital disaster. Once you find someone that you want to marry, you are bound to be swept up in all kinds of emotional responses. Under these circumstances, it may be very hard for you to adequately test each element of the relationship and remain within a Christian context. That said, you will always need to take time to learn about each other and build all the necessary foundation parts of a good relationship.